Finding Compassion in the Pivot

I have found myself stopping to question more and more why I am doing what I am doing and if it all makes sense.   There are certain things in my life right now I know are not working and yet I continue to push through and to find ways to make them work, but what if they are just not a good fit?  What if they will never work in the way I want them to? 

What if letting them go would actually make space for the new to arrive?

Can I compassionately let them go without being attached to the meaning that exists behind them or the idea of what I thought they would be.   Is it really possible to just let things go when they don’t work and to move on or do I have to dwell in what went wrong?   

Bringing up the continuous question of what is wrong with me? 

As you may know I started a weekly live call and community back in January.  When I had this idea it felt so aligned and the next natural step.   A forum and platform for people to continue the conversations from the podcast.  A place for yoga teachers to share in connection and challenges and offer one another support.    It started off strong and we have had an engaged group that has ebbed and flowed over the past year.   I always had an idea that it would be more people that it would grow  quicker.   

As of recent there have been less and less people attending the live call.   I have reached out for feedback and tried to understand why the change?  For some it is schedules and for some it is personal changes and for some it is lack of interest.   I have gone down the path of feeling like a failure or why didn’t this work as I thought it would and then I have brought myself compassionately back.  When I check in with myself  I know it is time to pivot.   It doesn’t feel as aligned to me anymore either.  

Does my worth get tested…absolutely.  I would be lying if I said it didn’t. 

I have spent so much of my life in that space.  Beating myself up over not getting it right or not figuring it out quicker or not having more “success”.

What I have found is that what is truly serving me always seems to find its natural path in.  

I am starting to get comfortable with continuously pivoting and finding my own way in.  To remind myself that I am human and I am learning and that forcing is not required when things are in alignment.     

My accomplishments do not determine my worth.  PERIOD.

When I move in the direction of things that do support me and naturally flow, I feel aligned.   When I contract and hold on to the idea of something that simply did not work I feel defeated.  

I am choosing to only stand in a place where I feel supported by me.

All life is is a series of pivots from one thing to the next.  

There will never be a time when it is all perfectly tied up in a bow. 

So each day I must be clear with myself. 

I must be willing to let go of the force and compassionately surrender to the pivot even if I have no idea what it looks like. I am starting to believe with my whole heart this is the only way to truly live into the magic of life.

Want to hear more on this topic listen to the Podcast Untapped Power Episode # 50  live on 12/10.