A Deeper Dive into Values and Why they Matter so Much
So let’s talk about values. What does it really mean to value yourself or how do you know what you do value and how do you charge for your value?
All of these are great questions to consider. Understanding our definition of value as well as identifying our own personal value is part of the practice of fully understanding ourselves.
When we think of the Yoga practice we are essentially selling people on the value of the practice. Everyone wants to understand the value of something before they move forward with it. There needs to be a reason for why they would choose to do it. For example you should consider practicing yoga because it will increase your flexibility or it will bring peace to the mind. If someone sees value in the practice they are going to keep coming back.
Do you ever notice throughout the course of your day how many times you are being sold on value?
Let’s start from the beginning. When we are born we adopt a set of beliefs and values that are a result of our culture or our caretakers at the time. We follow along with these values and beliefs until maybe we realize they do not fully align and we see the option for another set of values or beliefs. Then maybe we move into the phase of experimentation and questioning. Why do I have these values and beliefs and what would it mean to have different values and beliefs. Some of us may never move into the space of questioning we may stay in the space of sustaining the values and beliefs we were taught when we were young. We could certainly align with these values and beliefs but I think it is important to at least question them and make sure they are true for you.
The first question I would ask you to contemplate is what has value to you?
Be really honest with yourself and walk through all parts of your life.
For example I value my relationships, my independent time to meditate and be still, quality time with my family, eating healthy food, moving my body.
The second part of the practice is to go through this list and identify if you currently are aligning with your values. So if I value eating healthy am I choosing to eat healthy. When we work through this practice it is important to be honest with ourselves. To not play games. If we are not choosing to do something that we say we value then we need to have a real and honest conversation with ourselves. Do I really value this as much as I say I do? Why am I choosing not to take the necessary steps or actions to have it align? I think it is important to stay in the space of observation as long as you need. Observe why you are not feeling motivated or why you are not moving yourself forward. What is standing in your way. This part is important because it is different for everyone. You may want and look for someone to tell you why you haven’t done something in your life you value. They may tell you it is fear or you are just not motivated enough or maybe they have a different way of doing it that might work for you. I have heard it all and I am sure you have too. The point is this, your observation and experimentation will lead you forward. The unique method and system you develop for yourself is part of your practice and your work. I don’t believe we get the right to find a system that works for someone else and yes we can have someone as a sounding board to listen.
The thing I have found with values is they are continually changing. I cannot create my values and never come back to them. As I change and grow so do my values and there are times in my life where I may say I value something but my actions are not aligning with this. So I work through this circular practice of observing, asking questions and then making the small changes I need to move myself into alignment. When are values are in alignment and we are living our lives in alignment with our values that is true authenticity.
So why is it so important to know your values?
Your values align directly with how you spend your money and your time. Two of the most important things in the world that we often talk about.
When we move into the conversation of money and time we have to be clear. It is easy to say to someone all you have to do is value yourself and charge your worth, but what if I don’t know how to value myself and I don’t know what I am worth. First I will say money does not equate to self worth. How much money you make or what you charge is not an indication of your self worth. You are worthy just as you are. This is why spending the time to clearly know your values is so important.
Understanding what you value allows you to spend your time and money accordingly. I don’t believe there is a set amount of time or money that works for everyone to lead a life of fulfillment and joy. It will look different for everyone. When I work with clients to examine their finances it is not about cutting things out just to cut them out. It is about bringing awareness to your money and your time. Does your spending reflect what you value? If it does can you be accepting of it or are you comparing it to how someone else chooses to spend their money. The way you choose to spend your money is your own personal decision and that is why it is so important to have a clear why behind it. The same goes for your time ? Is how you are spending your time in alignment with your values. I think this is a big one for a lot of people. The excuse of not enough time is an easy one and we all don’t share in the same privileges have awareness for that as well.
And I believe fully that we all have the responsibility to take a look at how we spend our time. Are we conscious and aware of our time and how it is being used? One of the questions I come back to for myself is what is taking my time and am I okay with it? Whether it is people, circumstances, or decisions I have made I am required to investigate it if I want to change it. If I don’t choose to make a priority then someone else will.
When it comes to money people will pay anything for what they believe holds value it doesn’t matter what it is. So the conversation in the yoga community around how much should I charge or will people find this valuable is interesting. I come back to the reminder that not everyone has to find it valuable. We are not looking to work with everyone. There are certain people that will not find it valuable or will not be willing to the pay the price you are asking and that is okay.
Take some time to observe where you are spending your money and how much you are willing to pay for something and why? When we can get clear and articulate what we desire it allows others to do the same. For example I know why I may choose to spend $3000 on a yoga teacher training and why I am not willing to spend $500 on a concert and night out with friends. I take away the easy excuse of saying I don’t have that kind of money or I can’t afford it. I want to be very clear once again that we all hold different privileges and I am not saying that everyone can afford the same thing and it is just a matter of choosing differently. I am aware that the circumstances can be different for each of us. Now may not be the time when you can choose differently. Either way you can still practice observation and awareness and be willing to move yourself in that direction even if it is not happening right here and now.
To me our values our everything. They are key to unlocking our desires and to understanding ourselves. It is our real job to start to understand ourselves fully and completely. This is not an option it is a requirement and no one can do it for us.
So why not start now where you are. Take just today and ask yourself throughout the day why am I doing this or why am I spending this? Does it align with my values? And if it does not, ask yourself questions for clarity. Stay in that place of observation and awareness as long as you need to. And continue the practice for as long as you need to. We all have patterns and routines and if we observe them long enough we uncover our own trends for living and then we get to decide if they are serving us fully and completely.
The conversation on value is worth continuing. To me it is the ticket to financial freedom. It takes away the restriction and contraction and brings us closer into our heart.
Share below what you value and how you are showing up in alignment to your values?